The wisdom of the dead

Last week I went to Donaldsonville, Louisiana to visit Fr. Ayo, MSP. In Donaldsonville, there are many things that provoked thoughts in me. The Street behind the Church has a big cemetery. Not quiet five minutes walk from the cemetery is a catholic school. About three minutes walk from the school there is another Catholic Church. You see, Fr. Ayo ministers to people of African descent at St. Catherine of Sienna Church while Rev. Paul Yi, pastor of Ascension Catholic Church and St. Francis parish, ministers to Caucasian Catholics. Both Churches can now minister to people of any race, but in the past it was not so.

This reflection is focused on the cemetery that is within a walking distance between the two churches. As we walked pass it I observed absolute quiet and silence, a kind of serenity and peace. I wonder who the residences of this facility were. Were they peace loving or militant? Happy or sad? Racists or accommodating? White, black, Asian or the ‘other’? Rich or poor? Does anybody care now the type of car they had or not? Were they Christians or not? Catholics or Protestants? May be they had no religious affiliation. Did they posse firearms? Were they Democrats, Republicans or Independents? May be they had no party affiliation. Were they Straight, Gay, Transgender or bisexual? And finally, what is the state of their souls? Are they in heaven or hell? These and many more questions went through my mind as we took our daily walk around the neighborhood and had the privilege of passing the cemetery. 

We all should take a long loving walk around the cemetery every now then. This will give us an opportunity to reflect on life and the lessons we could glean thereof. You see, death is a great leveler, it doesn’t matter who you are or your status in life, when you die you are not different from an animal, your archenemy or your best friend. You will come to the same end and your destination is the same six feet down mother earth. Here is how the Psalmist sees it, “Why should I fear in evil days, the malice of the foes who surround me, men who trust in their wealth, and boast of the vastness of their riches? For no man can buy his own ransom, or pay a price to God for his life. The ransom of his soul is beyond him. He cannot buy life without end, nor avoid coming to the grave. He knows that wise men and fools must both perish and leave their wealth to others. Their graves are their homes for ever, their dwelling place from age to age, though their names spread wide through the land. This is the lot of those who trust in themselves, who have others at their beck and call. Like sheep they are driven to the grave, where death shall be their shepherd and the just shall become their ruler”, Ps. 49. If we know this then we should take St. Paul’s words to heart and behave accordingly. Listen to him, “There must be no competition among you, no conceit; but everybody is to be self-effacing. Always consider the other person to be better than yourself, so that nobody thinks of his own interests first but everybody thinks of other people’s interest instead. In your minds you must be the same as Christ Jesus” Philippians 2:1-11. Let us learn our lesson from the cemetery for the people there have so much to teach us just by their silence. This indeed is the wisdom of the dead! Where we are today, they were and where they are now we shall be!

Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow

Life’s lesson reminds us that everything that has a beginning must have an end. How often have we said goodbye to the friends we made in the past; our high school sweethearts; our college darlings and those we thought we would marry and be happy forever; those we thought our life would be incomplete without them. What about those we thought would make us happy, that without them we would never survive? Well then, here you are, still surviving and still moving on. You are doing well without those friends of yesteryears. Do you even know where they are now? Do you miss them? Aren’t you happy without them? Happiness is not out there; it is in you! You are either happy or you are not. No one can make you happy or sad. It is within your power to be happy or be sad. We are often nostalgic about yesterday, worried about today and apprehensive about tomorrow. Yet life’s lesson continues to warn us that yesterday is gone, there is nothing we can do about it, tomorrow is not yet here, no matter how apprehensive we may be about it, the only thing that counts is now, the present. It is called the present because it is a gift. But do we heed life’s lesson and receive it as a gift? No, not us! How can we ever survive without thinking about today, worrying about tomorrow and crying over the mistakes of yesterday? Joan Rivers expressed this sentiment thus: “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is God’s gift, that’s why we call it the present”. The Book of Ecclesiastes reprimands us against thinking that yesterday was better than today. “Do not say: How is it that former times were better than these? For is not in wisdom that you ask about this” 7:10.

Have we ever been able to change the course of things by worrying? Christ wants to spare us from unnecessary worries and so asks us to trust God and be rest assured of his providence. “Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘what shall we eat?’ or ‘what shall we drink?’ or ‘what shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble” Mt. 6:31-34.

So when we think that the past was better than the present let us know that we were not there. If we were, we may have been too young to remember the hardships that grown-ups endured then. Thank God for the past and those whose shoulders we stood so as to see today. For today, see what you can do to better the lots of your neighborhood so that the young ones may come to be grateful to God and to you. Do not say that the problems of today are too overwhelming and so fold your hands and do nothing. Be courageous, put on the gauntlet and go to work for a better tomorrow. For, according to the Spanish Proverb, “There is not enough darkness in the world to extinguish the light of one small candle”.  Let us be that candle shinning in the dark to beacon people who are walking in darkness to the warmth of our light. Yes, Hellen Keller, the American writer and lecturer was right when she said, “ “I am only one. But still I am one, I cannot do everything. I will not refuse to do the something I can do”. If you want today to be better than yesterday then doing nothing to change today for a better tomorrow is not an option.

Gossip

Life’s lesson warns us not to say anything about someone if it is not a positive contribution to the person’s life. How many people heed this important lesson of life? Few or none, if you ask me! Yet the Holy Book states: “Do to others whatever you would have them do to you”. This moral imperative is called the Golden Rule, cf. Lev. 19:18;Tobit 4:15; Mt 7:12; Lk. 6:31. It is sad and indeed unfortunate that people say things to tarnish the image of others behind their backs, things that may even be untrue, injurious and damaging to people’s lives; things that may have the potentiality of destroying their future. This is gossip, rumor, tittle-tattle, whispers, canards, tidbits, etc. etc. and those who have this as their stock in-trade are gossips, scandalmongers, gossipmongers, tattlers, busybodies, muckrakers, whisperers, and flibbertigibbets. Look around and see if you can spot any around you. Gossips are instigators and Christian murderers. There is nothing like innocent gossip or harmless tale-tale. Saying things that are untrue about someone or anyone is as uncharitable as depriving the person of freedom and the right to life.

The Holy Father, Pope Francis stated clearly on September 13 during his morning homily on gossip, that, “when people participate in this sin, we imitate Cain’s gesture in killing his brother Abel”. When we talk about others, we are indirectly saying that we are better than them. We ignore our faults and failures and concentrate on the faults and failures of others. Christ asks us simple questions: “Why do you notice the splinter in your brother’s eye, but do not perceive the wooden beam in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, “Let me remove that splinter from your eye,’ while the wooden beam is in your eye? You hypocrite, remove the wooden beam from your eye first; then you will see clearly to remove the splinter from your brother’s eye”, Mt 7:3-5. Pope Francis warns, “Those who live judging their neighbor, speaking ill of their neighbor, are hypocrites, because they lack the strength and the courage to look to their own shortcomings.” Therefore, “he/she who has hatred in his/her heart for his brother/sister is a murderer, he/she walks in darkness; he/she who judges his/her brother/sister walks in darkness”. Each time we participate in gossip and tale-tale, we are Christian murderers following in the footsteps of our patron saint Cain, the first murderer in history.

The pope concluded his homily with this warning: “Gossip always has a criminal side to it. There is no such thing as innocent gossip. The tongue is to be used to praise God, but when we use our tongue to speak ill of our brothers and sisters, we are using it to kill God”; “the image of God is in our brother or sister”. If we see ourselves as brothers and sisters in the Lord, created in the image and likeness of God, we will be slow in destroying that image of God in each other. In our lives together in the Church, our community or in our families, there is bound to be misunderstanding and conflicts but the solution is not in tearing each other apart. Neither does it in lie in engaging in character assassination. It is always in looking for the good of each other, in seeing potentiality for growth in everyone and in being joyful at our scanty triumphs. Gossip will only help in bringing quarrel, suspicion and in sowing a seed of discord and disunity among us. May God save us from the mouths of gossips! Amen and Amen and Amen!!!