Love entails Suffering

 We have heard people say many times, “there is not a crown without a cross”. This means is that nothing comes easy. There is no wishful thinking in being successful. If you want to be successful, work for it! If a student does not burn the mid-night oil, success in an examination may elude him/her as legs eluded the proverbial serpent. If you want something, go for it. If you want it bad enough, put in the time and work at it twice as hard. It is foolhardiness and indeed senseless to be jealous of someone who works hard to be successful while you rest on your oars thinking that the success should be yours.

In his Sunday Homilies, Year A, Mark Link, SJ wrote about Arthur Godfrey who had a sign on his office wall that read: “The fire, Lord, not the scrap heap.” Godfrey, according to Mark Link, said that the sign reminded him of a story about a blacksmith who suffered much illness but still maintained a strong faith in God. When unbeliever asked the blacksmith bow he could keep trusting God in spite of his illness, he replied: “When I make a tool, I take a piece of iron and put it in the fire. Then I strike it on the anvil to see if it can take temper. If it does, I can make a useful article out of it. If not, I toss it on the scrap heap”. Jeremiah the prophet alluded to this in the 18^th chapter of his prophecy, “I went to the potter’s house and there he was, working at the wheel. Whenever the object of clay, which he was making turns out badly in his hand, he tried again, making of the clay another object of whatever sort he pleased. Indeed, like clay in the hand of the potter, so are you in my hand, house of Israel”.  

Chastisement, punishment and suffering are part of life. No one enjoys suffering or chastisement when he/she undergoes it but at the end the person may begin to see the purpose of it. Jesus calls chastisement pruning. “I am the true vine, and my Father is the vine grower. He takes away every branch in me that does not bear fruit, and everyone that does he prunes so that it bears more fruit”, John 15:1-2.

To show how much God loves us, he sent his only Son to redeem us. “For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him might not perish but might have eternal life” Jn. 3:16. For Mark Link, “the crucifixion acts as a dramatic sign of Jesus’s great love for us. “The greatest love a person can have for his friends”, said Jesus, “is to give his life for them,”” Through his death Jesus invites us to show same love for others. He urges us not to be afraid of suffering even for the sins of others. For it is in suffering that we gain eternal life.

The problem is that we often run away from the fire and then end up in the scrap heap. Look at our prisons; most of those in these facilities would not have ended up there if they had taken the hard road and not the easy way to success. When parents abdicate their roles and responsibilities as parents, stop disciplining their children and allow them to grow wild, eventually the long arm of the law will catch up with them and they will end up in the grip of the police, the judge and in jail.

Love should not be confused with discipline. Proverbs 12:1 reminds us that “He who loves correction loves knowledge, but he who hates reproof is stupid”. When there is love, discipline and good values in the family, it is easy for a child to avoid the pitfalls of life. Love and discipline are not diametrically opposed but complimentary.  If you love me do not spare me the embarrassment of correcting me at home. You will prevent me from the shame of making that mistake in public. According to an African proverb a mentally deranged person brings shame to his family by behaving abnormally in public. Let us take warning from the book of Proverbs 13:24 which reads, “Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them. Love does not condone evil but stands up for the truth no matter how painful it may be. This painful and tough love may seem hard but very redemptive indeed. Are you prepared to show tough love to your friends, your children and even yourself?

Unless you become like children, there is no heaven for you!

Life’s lesson made it clear that the future belongs to our children. Any generation that messes with children messes with the future. Children, therefore, are the greater tomorrow. If we sow in our children today a bountiful harvest awaits us tomorrow. Therefore, a Church that has no children is a dead Church.

Someone asked me once why I love children. My answer was simple: children are innocent, sincere, honest and straightforward. They are not ambitious, spiteful and proud. If they like you, you will know and if they do not like you, by George, they won’t even come close to you, or they will simply tell you they do not like you. There is no deceit in children. They do not know how to hate or bear a grudge. They can fight with their friends one minute and before you know it, they have made up and are playing and chatting as if they never fought. For children, a black child and a white child are all the same. Any child that begins to hate, be deceitful and spiteful has grown in a family or an environment where those bad habits and attitudes are prevalent. Since children pick up what they see from adults, they begin to act accordingly.

In answering the question of who was the greatest in the Kingdom of heaven Jesus demonstrated thus: “he called a child over, placed it in their midst, and said, “Amen, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoever receives one child such as this in my name receives me” Mt. 18:1-5.

Children are dependent on their parents or guardians. They trust and look up to those who take care of them. There is nothing that a child has that is not given to him/her by his/her parents or guardians. A child has no money of his/her own, no bank account, no credit card, no car or home to pay mortgage on. And yet all his/her needs are provided for. If she is hungry, she asks for food, if she is sick, she tells the mother. When her clothes are dirty, the mother takes care of them. All the child needs to do is to be alive and her cares are in the hands of her/his parents or guardians. This is how Christ wants us to relate to God, since he is our Father. He urges us to depend on God for our needs. Listen: “Therefore, I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat (or drink), or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? “Look at the birds in the sky they do not sow or reap, they gather nothing into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them” Mt. 6:25.

We must therefore, be childlike and not childish. We must be humble and unassuming, innocent and sincere; be honest and straightforward in our dealing with one another. If there is a quarrel, like children, we should be quick in making up. Trust and depend on God for our needs. Be kind and forgiving and be fast in sharing what we have with others then the Kingdom of heaven will be ours for the asking. Good luck as you think seriously about the above life’s lesson.

Would you recognize Christ if you see him today?

If Jesus Christ comes to your door today would you recognize him? The image of Christ portrayed in films, art or in Sunday school may be very different from the real Christ. It is not easy to recognize Christ in the beggars, the poor, the sick, the homeless, and the strangers; or in your enemies or in those who hate and want to kill you. We know rationally that we are created in the image and likeness of God, but that concept is not easy to grasp internally and spiritually especially when we look at what is happening in the world today. We know that if we love God, we should also love our brothers and sisters, indeed everyone. “If anyone says, “I love God,” but hates his brother, he is a liar; for whoever does not love a brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen. This is the commandment we have from him: whoever loves God must also love his brother” 1 John 4:20-21. Is this what we notice around us and around the world? Far from it! Think of the Middle East, Iraq, Syria, Afghanistan, Pakistan, Ukraine, Russia, ISIS (Islamic State in Iraq and Syria), terrorists and extremists. Yet every Sunday Churches, mosques and synagogues are filled with worshippers who claim to love God (Allah or Yahweh) but cannot see eye to eye with their brothers and sisters.

There is a story told of a bishop who had a very disobedient priest in his diocese. He convened a disciplinary committee to decide the disciplinary action to take on the priest. The committee decided that the priest should be suspended for a year. His faculty was to be withdrawn, he was not to celebrate public Mass, and he was not allowed to take part in any diocesan activities. After giving his verdict, the bishop told the priest that if Christ were to be around, that was exactly what He would have done. At that moment, the Lord Jesus Christ appeared and said to the bishop ‘my judgment is that of mercy, compassion, forgiveness and love’. “Thus the Lord pass before him and cried out, “The Lord, the Lord, a merciful and gracious God, slow to anger and rich in kindness and fidelity” Ex. 34.6. On hearing this, the bishop rebuked Christ and ordered him to return to where he came from. He reminded Christ that he was killed because of his mercy and compassion.

It is obvious that we love a virtuous life, we admire it but we are not particularly in a hurry to live it out. Hence we like to pray like St. Augustine, ‘Lord make me holy but not just yet’ or sing the song, I surrender, I surrender some, I surrender, I surrender some, all to thee my blessed Savior, I surrender some. Why not surrender all?

So think about it: what does being a Christian really mean? It means walking in the footsteps of Christ, living life on Christ’s terms rather than mine. It means being my brother’s keeper. St Paul stated it thus, “I have been crucified with Christ; yet I live, no longer I, but Christ lives in me” Gal. 2:20.  So if our search is to bring us to the person of Christ, then know that he is not only found in the Church. Our search may bring us to where we started: the threshold of the slumps, the residence of the homeless, the gates of jails and prisons, the hospital wards, the ghettos of drugs, the immigration offices of Homeland security, the streets with beggars, yes, among the poor, the hopeless and the helpless. How comfortable are you with this Christ now that you have found him? Can you recognize him?